you have to add it to something that’s already good.
I mean, put a teaspoon of saffron or chilli into your mouth, chew some cinnamon sticks or crunch on some dried juniper berries, and it will be a pretty unimpressive gustatory experience. It might even be nauseatingly awful.
Add those same spices to a curry, a stew, a cake, and it can transform the good into the exceptionally sublime.
It’s the same with sex.
If you’re wanting to spice up your sex life you need to make sure you’ve got a good solid sex life first.
No sex toy, lingerie or new position ever transformed a sex life that wasn’t solid to start with; and if you try some of the more extreme spicy versions of sex without excellent connection and brilliant communication then it could well turn traumatic.
So make sure you’ve got the basics first: make sure you’ve got the bonding happening, that beforeplay is an on-going never stopping part of life, and that your sexual connection is real and solid.
Then, and only then, can you check out the spice rack and start experimenting.