The LoveLife Blog: guidance on mindful, bodyful, soulful loving!


#299: Take Your Penis for a Walk!

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, May 17, 2020



Seriously. Yes, you read that correctly: guys, take your penis for a walk. No not on a leash (unless you’re a bit kinky!)

What do I mean by that rather absurd suggestion? I mean, get connected with your penis.

As you go out and about, be aware of your penis. As you feel the warmth of the sun, notice your penis feeling it too. When you savour your coffee, notice your penis savouring it too. When you observe the women around you and feel their feminine energy, have your penis feel it too. When you feel the power of swimming laps or going for a run or pumping weights, have your penis feel the power too. When you’re cheering your team on and getting excited at a goal, feel your penis cheering along. When you’re sharing a laugh with mates or at the movies, your penis laughs along with you. When you’re feeling thoughtful and reflective, your penis is meditative too.

It sounds strange, but the more you do this, the more connected you will become with your penis. Rather than it being an out of control creature with a mind of its own, it will become your partner in pleasure. You’ll be a team.... read more


#294: Take Your Penis for a Walk!

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, May 17, 2020

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#294: Q&A: My Husband Can't Keep an Erection, and He Smokes Lots of Marajuana

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, March 29, 2020

 From my column in Body+Soul

Question
: "My husband and I have been happily married for 10 years and recently he's wanted a lot more sex. At first I thought it was great, but he can't seem to keep his erection up and I can't help but feel disappointed. He's started smoking marijuana a lot more heavily lately - could this be to blame? What can I do?" 

Answer: There is so much pressure on penises. The poor things are supposed to rise to attention on command, stay hard for hours, only ejaculate when desired - and if they can’t do that, then the sex is considered poor, he has 'failed'. No wonder so many men suffer from performance anxiety!

As a society we’re adding to that pressure with all the porn that’s being watched, with endless footage of big hard cocks that appear to last for hours (never mind the reality that there are teams of women off set whose sole role is to keep the leads hard). And even on a more positive note, now that we quite rightly acknowledge the female partner’s right to pleasure, that can also add to pressure.

So, let’s take the pressure off your partner’s penis by looking at sex... read more



#289: Q&A: My Husband Can't Keep an Erection, and He Smokes Lots of Marajuana

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, March 29, 2020

Download Audio: Q&A: My Husband Can't Keep an Erection, and He Smokes Lots of Marajuana

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#269: The Pleasure of A Soft Cock

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, September 08, 2019

 

There is so much pressure on penises. The poor things are supposed to rise to attention on command, stay hard for hours, only ejaculate when desired - and if they can’t do that, then the sex is considered poor, he has 'failed'.

 But what’s so wrong about a soft cock?

 Nothing, and there’s plenty of pleasure to be had with one:
  • It’s lovely and soft and malleable. 

  • It feels good for the man to have his soft cock handled. 

  • It’s easy for the woman to play with a soft cock with her hands or mouth.
  • Intercourse can feel better with a softer cock, particularly anal sex. 

  • You can even have sex with a completely soft cock. It’s part of the subtle approach I encourage, where you simply join genitals, do nothing, and notice the ecstatic sensations that arise.
If the woman wants something hard and phallic inside and there’s no erection on hand to satisfy, well then, use your hands! Fingers have bones so they’re potentially always boners! Talented digital stimulation of the vagina is a wonderful thing. Or use toys - dexterous use of dildos and vibrators is a similarly excellent experience. Or check out the pantry... read more


#264: The Pleasure of a Soft Cock

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, September 08, 2019

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#268: Make Every Stroke Count

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, August 25, 2019



A client of mine who'd done my Blackbelt in the Bedroom seminar for men said that afterwards he had the best sex ever. 

He said: “I applied everything you taught us. I made every stroke count. It was unbelievable!”

I was so proud of him! What he was doing was making love with focus, presence, deep connection, and of course, with love. In this way every nuance, every moment, every stroke was meaningful.

As he said, it was mind-blowing. Deep, connected, focused sex is truly awesome.

So take his advice: make every stroke count.



Learn what this man learned, enrol in my online course for men. Click on the banner below!


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#263: Make Every Stroke Count

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, August 25, 2019

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#234: Penises - does size really matter?

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, April 01, 2018

 

Penises come in all shapes and sizes, and all with the same intention in mind – to have great sex. But with all the variation, which penises are the most effective, and does size really matter?

To stimulate the vagina a penis needs to touch the sides, so girth is an important factor. Some penises are thick enough to fill most women, some are too thick for comfort, and a large proportion need deft handling to reach the good spots - not being thick enough to fill all around (although that also depends on the size of the vagina in question - there’s considerable variation in capacity and muscle tautness there too).

But never fear, if your girth is less than ideal, it’s more about how you wield your member than its size. So here are some tips for guys of all sizes:

Modest
Prove your skills as a lover before she gets to see your member. She’ll already be impressed and size won’t be a big issue. She’ll also be good and aroused, and a well-aroused vagina is a responsive vagina, so her muscles are more likely to naturally clamp around your penis, increasing sensation.

Your advantage in the penile... read more


#229: Penises - does size really matter?

Jacqueline Hellyer - Sunday, April 01, 2018

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